Of a Lifetime War

I find asking myself such question now-a-days: Any wind of change? Any hope of domaniting these thousand 'against the fitrah' (un-natural) urges that destroy the solace and harmony (the latter term as they say much misunderstood and misused) in me, the two precious things I inherited from my innocent childhood days?

[Pause in the flood of thoughts and feelings]

Shaikh Isa Nur-ud-din said:

"A noble man is one who dominates his self."

When you're caught up in later part of your life due to your misdeeds of past, how do you take the very first step? What if you're terrorized not by the troubles of this war you're to wage, but by the horrific error you live in, which has the potential to destroy you completely, in case you surrender?! Can this latter thought, when in affirmative, help the first proactive step sustain?
Or, can you ever hit-the-nail at the right spot if you're not even aware of the situation completely?

The answer to the last question is in Nay. Here becomes the "useful knowledge" - the kind of knowledge that takes Man from darkness to light - a blessing for being a 'necessity' in the first place. Some call it the "force": the energy behind the right offense againt the wrong offense. And rightly so. It's indeed a blessing, the right knowledge that frees man from error.

I thank God for that. And my prayer is - O Lord free us from the intoxication of ignorance and of this world.

* * *

You never are, however, in the position to say: All the rest is the work of man if you're a just Man once you have known the truth through God's help, or that you're given a set of integers to manipulate with them. Prayer is must for many reasons. One reason that fits in the mosaic this post is: on the one hand, there's "Taqdeer e Mutliq/Mutlaq", which means that destiny can change with the help of prayer or by some other mean; and on the other, there's "Taqdeer e Mubarram" (please correct these terms if wrong), the sort of destiny that is absolute and unchangable. Since we never know what the case is with someone, or with a particular situation, so it proves that prayer is must!
Prayer after "discernment between the Absolute and the Relative, the Real and the Illusion" is most "essential" thing for me, as it was for late Shaikh Isa Nur-ud-din.